Alan_Partridge_Ton

A direct free kick. James ‘Jimmy’ Gourlay. 20th minute. Foot like a traction engine!

Can I just shock you? I like The Cafe.

Aberdeen... that’s a goal! And another! Do you like my footballs? I’ve got two goals, you’ve got none! Rangers have failed to make Progres!

God I’ve missed you.

Don’t you ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever say something like that again!

No? Neither do I. Thank you.

Would you like to go for a pint?

Gigi, can I just stop you there.... I like wine.

Boof! Eat my goal. And another!

RIP thread. Cone but not forgotten!

How do you know this stuff about someone from a message board who doesn’t post under their real name?

Ed de Ball as I live and breath. You were suspended from here for making racist comments. God bless your racist soul!

Beamish!

And Beamish!

The Emirates? My advice to Ed would be don’t go to London never mind the Emirates. Go to London! I guarantee you'll either be mugged or not appreciated. Catch the train to London, stopping at Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway!

Ders more to Oireland, dan diss!

A shame. One of the greats.

R.E.M. - Accelerate (album)

There's a reason you're only North Norfolk's second favourite DJ. That choice of music is sa-aaaaaa-ad. And rumour is, your back on the boddle!