Alan_Partridge_Ton

What is it you hate about Manpower so much?

Yep, fair enough. Good point!

Ray McKinnon really is a little bollocks!

What did you do? Did you draw a ladies part on the wall in the lavatory?

Can I just surprise you? I like Falkirk.

Ed de Ball is fine. LinwoodTon is fine. Lord Volvic is fine. Dr Zhivago is fiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnneeeeeeee.

Also, will you be doing the Wanderers’ club house? I can arrange a guided tour if you like?

An unsung gem of the Greenock pub scene.

It’s a good Rangers pub.

Awful. That reminds me of something my PA Lynn, 50, came up with one time... Oh, rattling roaring Willy, He's off to the BBC! Oh, rattling roaring Willy, He's off to the BBC, Oh, Willy goes there and Willy goes there and there, Willy goes there and Willy goes there and there.... Extraordinary.

Classic Queen!

Crabsticks do not contain any crab!

Oh god yeah. Fascinating creatures though. Looks like a lady, but really it’s a man. I don’t find them attractive, it’s just confusing.

Has anyone ever been in The Greenock Wanderers’ clubhouse for a pint of bitter?

Peephole Pringle!

Come on TonOfMemories.... tell me about the Ladyboys!

Agreed. The last sentence is particularly sickening... ‘It doesn’t worry me, I’ve coped with worse.’

Haven’t been in yet. Is it that bad? They’ve got a decent beer garden from memory but haven’t been in since it was the A and S.

Catch the train to London! Stopping at... Rejection, Disappointment, Back-stabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway!

Perfectly summed up. Horrible team.

I f*cking hate Spurs.

Tony Stokes, foot like a Tractor engine!

I’ll probably head to Choristers instead. The security there is so lax. They’d probably even let someone like beetee in!

Does anyone want to go for a pint in The Cafe?

I see Rugged Island have signed Father Romeo Sensini. He’s got a foot like a traction engine!