General Football - Weird Results And Other Things Worth Sharing

[TRVMP]

I'm in a semi-rural motel near Fort Hood and the wifi's been down all evening until a few minutes ago. I didn't pack any books for a one night trip. And my phone charger's wireless, so I couldn't use my phone while it was charging. There's only so long you can look out the window and hope for an entertaining pile-up. And I'm up early tomorrow so I'm not going out drinking.

Thus, at a loss for anything to do, I broke a personal rule and turned on the TV. (TV rots your brains. TV news in particular makes you dumber than you were before. There's a reason they call them TV programs - that's literally what they do, they program people. Don't watch TV. It's crap anyway, for the most part.)

Imagine my delight to find that Univision Deportes was showing Chivas against Queretaro... on FIFA. The official eLiga MX is now broadcast all across the North American continent. I know the whole FIFA eSports thing isn't new but I'd never seen it on broadcast television before.

I didn't watch it obviously, because watching strangers play video games is shit and boring, but still, nice to know it was an option. I watched two episodes of American Dad that I'd seen years ago and they were quite funny. I was surprised at how much of them I remembered.

[TRVMP]

Getafe stay in the Primera after a very difficult season. Amazing goal from on-loan Take Kubo to seal a 2-1 win over Levante:

 

[TRVMP]

I've posted before saying that I watch a lot of semi-obscure football, particularly that in and around my timezone here in Dallas. Was watchin the highlights from the Goiano state championship in Brazil earlier and I think I might have found the worst shootout penalty of all time:

Skip to 1:06 if the link doesn't do it for you. How much of a bellend would you feel if you'd "struck" that spot kick? It's a guy named Arthur Rezende who missed it; apparently a local lad who came through with local giants Goiás and later had spells in Europe with Gil Vicente and AEL. He's tumbling down through the clubs now.

I went on the Vila Nova website and in a true case of taking it well, they're saying striker Kelvin had a legitimate goal ruled out by VAR earlier in the game. But regardless, Grêmio Anápolis won the title, their first ever state championship since being founded in 1999.

Vila Nova probably won't mind too much because at the national level they are finally back in Serie B and they kick off on Friday against Carioca giants Botafogo.

[Hej]

10 years without a Champions League win for the bald fraud despite managing teams that should be nailed on for the semi-finals minimum every year by default, and signing about £1billion worth of additional players in that time.

 

The most overrated manager in history. 

[vikingTON]

More attacking midfielders shoehorned into a team than Hopkin's summer transfer window. Looks on baldly as his team concedes a hilariously easy goal on the break and registers one shot on target.

[TRVMP]

Insomnia crew (or anyone else joining me in the Western hemisphere) tune in for the Clausura final in Mexico. It's Cruz Azul - Santos Laguna. The blues are 1-0 up from the first leg back in Torreón. Tonight at the Azteca, in the pouring rain in front of a restricted but very loud crowd, the hosts will surely finish the job at their adoptive home.

Incredibly Cruz Azul haven't won the league since the Apertura of 1997. Santos, a much younger club, won the Claurusa just three years ago, their sixth title overall to Cruz Azul's eight.

Both clubs have their origins in corporations. Cruz Azul is named for the cement giant of the same name and is indeed still owned by them; Santos were owned by the Corona brewing company for years until being sold off around a decade ago.

Game's kicking off in just a couple of minutes. It might be Jesús Corona's last game. The 40-year-old goalkeeper has been with Cruz Azul for 11 years and wants to stay but they will probably release him, which will be the end of an era. Also worth watching is striker Jonathan Rodríguez. The striker had two decent seasons at Santos Laguna but moved to Cruz Azul in 2018 and he's been one of the league's top strikers ever since. I expect him to score tonight.

[TRVMP]

Cruz Azul were absolutely rotten in the first half. A fine Santos Laguna goal - admittedly poorly defended - early on had them 1-0 down. But some inexplicably poor Santos defending and a nice Rodríguez finish make it 1-1 on the night, 2-1 to the hosts on aggregate.

That's after a triple Cruz Azul sub at the break, by the way. Santi Giménez came on as one of those and promptly wasted a good one-on-one opportunity but it looks like it's paid off regardless.

edit: you're allowed five subs in the final, to be clear, they didn't use them all.

Edited May 31, 2021 by TRVMP

[TRVMP]

Absolutely crap game, it has to be said, but that's Cruz Azul with their first title in 23 years. Santi Giménez is still rubbish and needs to be released. Should have been at least three red cards at the end but the ref bottled it. Lots of work for Cruz Azul to do but they earned it over the two legs.

Also, it has to be said, the Mexican league trophy is sexy as fuck. Look it up.

[TRVMP]

Also: it's just been announced that we're going to win the Euros.

[TRVMP]

Colombia's opener against Brazil right there was absolutely crazy, look it up.

[TRVMP]

Honestly not trying to come across as a football hipster but this Brazil-Colombia game - still 1-0 to the visitors - has been better than most of the Euros matches.

[TRVMP]

Spoiler n'at but Brazil score the winner in the 100th minute.

[vikingTON]

7 hours ago, TRVMP said:

Honestly not trying to come across as a football hipster but this Brazil-Colombia game - still 1-0 to the visitors - has been better than most of the Euros matches.

It should be. Most of the other matches that I've flicked over to have been significantly worse though (normally involving Venezuela parking the bus). 

[TRVMP]

Argentina 1-1 Colombia with 10 minutes to go but that doesn't even tell half the story. One of the craziest second halfs I've seen in ages. Some incredible last-ditch Colombian defending (and, it has to be said, profligate Argentine attacks) keep the underdogs alive.

[TRVMP]

Argentina sneak through on penalties. They deserved it over the piece, and Martinez had a brilliant shoot-out, but still harsh on Colombia.

Brazil-Argentina final on Saturday. Looking forward to it. I'll be at the El Salvador - Curacao game in the Gold Cup then will head back down the road and watch the Copa final at home.

[dunning1874]

I saw Cuba got turfed out of the Gold Cup on account of being unable to fulfil their fixtures after not being granted visas to enter the US in time. Has there been much coverage of that over your way? If it has been the US government obstructing them as opposed to the Cuban government themselves it seems extremely harsh and you'd have thought CONCACAF wouldn't have been pleased with the US rather than just telling Cuba tough shit, but I've struggled to find any concrete information on what actually happened and there are suggestions Covid regulations had an impact as well.

[TRVMP]

4 hours ago, dunning1874 said:

I saw Cuba got turfed out of the Gold Cup on account of being unable to fulfil their fixtures after not being granted visas to enter the US in time. Has there been much coverage of that over your way? If it has been the US government obstructing them as opposed to the Cuban government themselves it seems extremely harsh and you'd have thought CONCACAF wouldn't have been pleased with the US rather than just telling Cuba tough shit, but I've struggled to find any concrete information on what actually happened and there are suggestions Covid regulations had an impact as well.

No, there's been virtually no coverage as the official broadcasters are hardly going to go digging for it. CONCACAF themselves imply that it was down to a combination of factors, including a lack of COVID testing. 

CONCACAF, much like the United Nations, exists in its current form at Washington's pleasure. The rest of the continent doesn't have the infrastructure nor the money to run things in the manner to which they've become accustomed. This is roughly the equivalent of France rejecting visa applications from the Faroes. 

[TRVMP]

Sue Curacao's pulled out. Curaçao have "been withdrawn" by CONCACAF coz they caught the wet market flu. 

Guatemala have been drafted in as late replacements, presumably because half the country lives in Houston and New York anyway so they can easily raise a squad, but the game that was supposed to be at 4pm today has moved to 9:30pm tomorrow. That means it'll be nice and balmy but it also means I'm getting a fucking refund because I'm up at 6am on Monday and wouldn't be home from the game til well after midnight. 

[TRVMP]

This - Panama 2-1 Honduras (with 40 minutes to go) has been the best game of the tournament so far. Not the smoothest or best quality but in terms of drama and end-to-end action it's been absolutely gripping stuff.

After being cruelly denied last week's game due to Curacao's absence, tomorrow night I will go and see what is effectively a dead rubber between Guatemala and Trinidad and Tobago up in Frisco. I could have walked just four miles away to see Mexico-El Salvador at the Cotton Bowl but I'd rather be a hipster and drive half an hour up to Collin County and rattle around Toyota Stadium with a couple of thousand Guatemalans. 9pm kickoff tomorrow, presumably to accommodate prime time TV in California and, to a lesser extent, Mexico.

[TRVMP]

In the ten minutes since I've posted that there's been a penalty given, then reversed, then two goals from Honduras, the second (their third overall) an absolutely brilliant counterattack.

The atmosphere's absolutely amazing too. It's down in Houston, which has a big Honduran population (and a few Panamanians) and the noise is intimidating.