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Happy St. Patrick's Day


capitanus

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The best cooked breakfast I've ever had was cooked by a cafe in Galway. Observe perfection and apply its rules:

 

 

1AdcYf7.jpg

 

Missing key ingredients such as slice, mushrooms and beans. The potato farl when cooked properly is lovely, but there's only one of them which is poor. The egg has been cooked in too hot a pan and hard yolks are p**h. Black pudding again looks to have been cooked too quickly and has subsequently dried out. The bread should be moved onto the side plate to allow for more ingredients to be added. Redeeming features are nicely cooked bacon and sausages.  

 

5/10. 

You address me by my proper title, you little bollocks! 


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The old Fry up Police page was absolute comedy gold. Folk getting their fry-ups absolutely rinsed.

 

That effort above lacks so many things that it'd be sent packing on that page and VT possibly left on the verge of tears.

It was my favourite page on Facebook, if you produced a 9/10 or above you were a God, anything below that (like the incomplete effort posted) and you were an abject failure.

You address me by my proper title, you little bollocks! 


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Missing key ingredients such as slice, mushrooms and beans.

 

Two of those three ingredients are superfluous extras to the fundamental cooked breakfast; meanwhile the slice for obvious geographical reasons has been substituted by the Irish white pudding. And very effectively so, as their white pudding is one of the stars of the show; as opposed to all the terrible Scottish 'white pudding' efforts, both savoury and with the fucking bizarre addition of dried fruit. 

 

Consider your feedback denied then. 

The site is supposed to be a place for the extended 'family' of Morton supporters - having an affinity with people that you don't know, because you share a love of your local football club. It's not supposed to be about point scoring and showing how 'clever' or 'funny' you are, or just being downright rude and offensive to people you don't know, because you can get away with it. Unfortunately, it seems the classic case of people who have little standing/presence in real life, use this forum as a way of making themselves feel as if they are something. It's sad, and I've said that before..

 

So, having been on Morton forums for about 15 years I guess, I've had enough... well done t*ssers, another Morton supporter driven away. You can all feel happy at how 'clever' you are

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I don't believe there's such a thing as a tomato, cut in half, and cooked under the grill properly, because any grill being used for a catering purpose will be too hot to grill a tomato properly - that is to say, you can get a nice caramelized top, but inside it'll still be cold and hard. You could instead roast it or make it into a confit, but that's a separate task. Thus, to include tomatoes in a cooked breakfast, it's easier to use cherry tomatoes and grill those instead, on a baking tray preferably, and you get all the benefits of the grill without a cold interior.

 

 

In a professional kitchen you would have a hotplate with a 'pass' which are normally heated by halogen bulbs and these can get very hot. Years ago when I'd be making up a breakfast buffet (over 20 yrs ago now - fck me I'm getting old) Tomatoes be the first thing I'd put out under the halogen lamps as they'd cook perfectly just on the heat of the lamps - to the exact same type of consistency as they would by if they were roasted in a fan assisted oven at 185c for 20 mins.

 

 

Absolutely correct about mushrooms, though. A well-dried, properly-seasoned mushroom is a delight with any salty or savory dish. A breakfast is hugely dimished without them.

I'm straying well off the reservation here but I've often thought that sautéed cabbage with a spritz of lemon would make a fine accompaniment to a breakfast, adding crunch, flavor, and indeed a veneer of health.

I used to cook around 30kg of mushrooms at a time in a great big machine called a 'Bratt Pan' which were fantastic for making just about anything.

 

I like cabbage, but prefer it raw, shredded with some chopped parsley and lemon juice. Far too many people overcook cabbage which puts me off it.

*insert signature here*

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Give this a shot:

 

https://www.chinasichuanfood.com/chinese-style-cabbage-stir-fry/

 

On a western frying pan, it'll need to cook a bit longer than 30 seconds in all likelihood, over a slightly lower heat.

 

You can also include pork belly or even bacon.

 

We make this all the time, it's incredibly easy but very tasty and healthy (we use more cabbage for 1tbsp of oil than the woman writing the recipe does, but doubtless it'll be tastier if you keep the ratio the same. Really, we can get four servings out of 1tbsp.)

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  • 4 weeks later...

Mushrooms!? And on a breakfast?! Mushrooms deserve their rightful place, straight in the fucking bin. Horrendous.

 

When mushrooms are cooked properly they're absolutely beautiful. 

You address me by my proper title, you little bollocks! 


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